back in the early 2000’s online dating was riding the wave of taboo. if you were on a dating site, you were most likely not shouting it from the roof tops. and you for sure were getting questions such as “why don’t you just meet them at ___________ (fill in the blank.)“
it was during this early season of online dating that my mom ended up meeting her husband. who knew that their love story thirteen plus years later would be the sliver of hope I would cling to when I so hesitantly downloaded the app, Bumble.
let’s pause and back up.
allow me to take you back to my early twenties, you would see a girl who did not date. had her head in the clouds believing the first guy she dated she should marry. and at the age of twenty five I blindly stepped into what would be a five year relationship – one I wouldn’t rave about.
fast forward after that not so stellar relationship ended, I found myself a thirty year old gal, living in sunny las vegas with a job I loved — surrounded by a great community of well – couples.
now before i hit download, i spent time navigating weird world of dating. going on blind dates. being rescued from so called blind dates. dating friends of friends. making choices with my heart. basically, a rude awakening to the difficulties of dating.
after trial and error I came to the conclusion that I was the one getting in my way – it was time to get my head right so that my heart wouldn’t lead me down a dead end road.
so at the beginning of 2018 as I was laying on my couch with broken ribs, I reluctantly downloaded the app Bumble.
it began a journey of learning how to write opening one liners, how to assess real quick who was looking for one thing only and let’s just say you learn a ton about the human experience going on a dating app.
i for sure have a few cringe worthy stories and was ghosted, which had me deleting the app real quick, and pausing to see if this really was worth my time.
because dating if you are serious – is a full time job.
when I decided to give Bumble one last go around I made it super clear to myself what I was not going to swipe right on the following.
- shirtless gym selfies – YES, please work out – however I don’t need picture proof.
- photos with drinks in hand / at a club; with being in vegas you tend to run up against this one. here’s the thing, i’m not a huge drinker, nor do I go clubbing – so why swipe on that?
- photos with other girls – I don’t care if you tell me she’s your cousin – one I don’t believe you and two – just no.
- profile has words – if you are serious on this app, you better be writing something about yourself on here.
*basically get clear with your morals ladies – get clear with not wasting your time on someone whose morals or beliefs don’t line up with yours.
with those guidelines I got back on and started to swipe.
coming across a handsome guy. his two photos were of him holding a cupcake, another in a uniform. okay, hits the check points. his profile though I don’t recall all of it did read “looking for the chip in my chocolate chip cookies.” cute – corny – and considering I do make some good cookies – on point.
i swiped right — and well, connection.
this lead to messaging through the app, then texting through our phones, to a quick sponanetious coffee chat where one of my employees totally crashed it — to an actual date that I almost bailed on.
we’ll come back to that story.
however, after the first date – with hesitation I gave myself permission to give this man a chance, to give dating a chance again. and this time, it finally all clicked.
so, thirteen years after my mom met my bonus dad online, God found it clever and quite fitting to have me find my missing puzzle piece using an iPhone and swiping right.
moral of this bumble story – accept that how you meet your partner may look different than what is envisioned in your head, or told to you by society or more so family. as much as I disliked getting uncomfortable it ended up being a catalyst for goodness I have found in our relationship.
download the app. go on that date. say yes to a blind date. the universe, God – they’ve got your back – it may just take time.
